Saturday, May 8, 2010
My Very Own Personal Godwink
Ah, one of my favorite faith building moments. During a time when my faith was wavering, I started reading a wonderful little book called When God Winks at You. At that time our little guy was four and his stroke was wreaking havoc on his little body. He was struggling with seizures, visual impairment, cerebral palsy, and significant developmental delays.
The lowest point came when his seizures stopped responding to the medicine. At the same time, he caught a stomach virus that led to dehydration and hospitalization. Since the seizure medicine had stopped working we agreed to take him off of it while in the hospital. Once he came off of the medicine the seizures went away. Just like Romans 8:28 promises, God worked the stomach virus out for Ryan’s good. The virus that landed him in the hospital ultimately led to his becoming seizure free. We were grateful to have the seizures gone; however, things would get worse before they got better.
During the months following the hospital stay, he struggled with withdrawals from the medicine. He had extreme anxiety, restlessness, and cried more often than not. It was such a huge change for him. Prior to coming off the medicine he was a very happy child. He would even wake up laughing hysterically in the middle of the night. If we asked him what he was laughing at he just laughed harder. Our child had gone from waking up laughing hysterically in the middle of the night to waking up crying hysterically throughout the day and night.
Eventually, the withdrawals subsided but he still wasn’t his happy, laughing self; he even seemed depressed at times. One night, after reading one of the Godwink stories, I started thinking about the nights when Ryan used to wake up in the middle of the night laughing. It was the cutest thing. We would wake up, sort of, giggle at him and drift back off to sleep fairly quickly.
Just before I fell asleep, I briefly mentioned to God, “Lord, it would be a cool Godwink to have him wake up laughing like that again tonight.” Sure enough, in the middle of the night, at 2:11 am to be exact, he woke up again laughing hysterically. Even though he hasn’t done that since then, the laughter that night still reassures me that God really does have our seemingly chaotic life under control.
I’m so thankful for the Godwink books, but I’m especially thankful for Godwink moments. Our family now looks more closely for those little reassuring winks from God, which we can all have if we just ask and expectantly watch for them.